Why I Am Not Scared Of Dying

why I am not scared of dying

It is heading up to a quarter of a century since my brother decided to exit this world. To the day I leave this world, I will never forget the grief and shock on the day I learnt of his passing. And, 25 years on, I often think of him and what it would have been like if he had survived. I believe the two of us would have formed a superb digital marketing team with our combined talents.

Since Gary died, I have lost both my parents. Mum died seven years ago, and my father will be three years in November 2022. Dad died just before this Covid nonsense, and I'm delighted he escaped the circus.

Drawn by Gary (Gaz) Doran. Depicting himself escaping from the devil.
Note: I have not gone into this much on this post but my brother was molested by a Catholic priest and this was the result of his depression and finally taking his life.

Grief is different for all of us. Gary's death hit me harder than my parents because he was so young, and it was sudden. Gary (Gaz), as we called him, died at the age of 34. During Covid, there were many suicides due to lockdowns and income losses, and for those left behind, it is a hard place to be. Trust me, I know. I also know that time heals. It does.

Jungle Design Bracelets

The passing of Gaz took me deeper into the spiritual journey that has been a part of life since I can remember. I've always wondered what this place was all about and why are we here. I'm 60 now, and I have read thousands of near-death experiences (NDE) accounts, and without a doubt, I believe our soul moves on to a spectacular place. Apart from reading reports of people who have experienced an NDE and interviewing others, I have had profound spiritual experiences during my life. These include out of body experiences (OBE), sleep paralysis, telepathy, and intuitive abilities.

Here are a few of my experiences that has given me faith and hope

Close encounters of the third kind


I had witnessed two UFOs high in the sky when I was out jogging on a country road in my thirties. The two of these objects were whizzing past each other at enormous speed then they took off.

When I was 14, I had a vivid dream that I can still recall. I saw a spacecraft in the dream, and it was not a round disk. It was huge, the size of a city, and I can only describe it as looking like something made out of lego. Before Gary died, I told him about this dream, and he told me he had the same dream. Gary was an artist, so I asked him to draw me what he saw. It was the exact same craft that I had seen in my dream.

Spiritual Visit

On another occasion, when I was pregnant with my first child, I had an experience where three spiritual beings were putting my soul back into my body.

I met God

In my late twenties, I had an operation, and under anaesthetic, I went to a place in the Universe where I met God. God told me everything about the Universe, and God also said to me that I would remember what I knew, but I would not remember what. To this day, I can distinctly remember that feeling of love and understanding.

Gary's Visit

A few days after Gary died, I cried in my bed when I heard his voice. His voice was just outside my right ear, and he said to me, "Deb, I'm OK; everything you believe in life after death is true, and I am very happy". At the same time, I have a vivid vision of him, and he indeed was happy.

Mum and Dad say Hi From Heaven

On the day dad died, I needed some alone time later in the day, so I drove to my local beach. The wind was howling, and no one else was on the beach but me.

No birds and shells were washing up on the coast because it was too windy. I walked about 2 kilometres before turning around to return, and while I was doing so, two giant sea birds flew past me, dancing and seeming so happy that I couldn't explain it! They made a circle above me, flew back, and vanished; they appeared as if they weren't just flying; they were dancing!

Shells spiritual sign
The shell that washed up by my feet